Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Randomize
