stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
