what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
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