Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
