i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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