I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
