I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
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