Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
