Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Randomize
