Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Randomize
