what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
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