look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
My ass is underappreciated
Randomize
