Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
