): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
What happened to fro yo and sex?
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Randomize
