I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
