yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize