is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Randomize
