he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Randomize
