I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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