It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize