its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
