I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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