He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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