Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
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