this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Randomize
