Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
