if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
