they need to just BURY HIM!
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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