Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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