We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Help. Why am I so naked?
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