You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Randomize
