He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
