Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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