After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
