I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
they need to just BURY HIM!
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
