did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
