it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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