Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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