CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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