my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
