If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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