there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Randomize