So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
