i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize