Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
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