Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
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