Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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