I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
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