Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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