how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
so let's talk penis.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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